I xpereince cycling petit-mal seizures which flirt around with becoming big bad grands. While I’m getting physically pounded an old familiar hallucination/sensation visits.
Originally I’d lost the sense of smell. The only times I could smell was when smelling a non-smell: an ol factory hallucination and therefore not a smell at all.
Recently I had a bad long attack and in the midst of a lot of physical discomfort a separate feeling, so distinct- familiar, it is almost as if. But this comforting reminder generated by my mind is simply a hallucination- like smelling something that isn’t. Just the brain remembering but so very vividly.
Finally the attack ends, I physically begin improving BUT I so prefer the lie of that hallucination to reality that part of me battles to bring that lie back to life. At such times I don’t do particularly well at reminding myself, and really believing, that this comforting sensation of someone IS an hallucination my brain has modeled after a real and actual person- a friend of yours.
Eventually I make myself remember how things actually and really are. I’m working on a better behavioral modification strategy for that and those half light times.
Anything that arrives- just mark it: return to sender like the Elvis Presley song.
-4unately and maybe unforrtunately as well they'll be arriving at PO Box 1947.
Originally I’d lost the sense of smell. The only times I could smell was when smelling a non-smell: an ol factory hallucination and therefore not a smell at all.
Recently I had a bad long attack and in the midst of a lot of physical discomfort a separate feeling, so distinct- familiar, it is almost as if. But this comforting reminder generated by my mind is simply a hallucination- like smelling something that isn’t. Just the brain remembering but so very vividly.
Finally the attack ends, I physically begin improving BUT I so prefer the lie of that hallucination to reality that part of me battles to bring that lie back to life. At such times I don’t do particularly well at reminding myself, and really believing, that this comforting sensation of someone IS an hallucination my brain has modeled after a real and actual person- a friend of yours.
Eventually I make myself remember how things actually and really are. I’m working on a better behavioral modification strategy for that and those half light times.
Anything that arrives- just mark it: return to sender like the Elvis Presley song.
-4unately and maybe unforrtunately as well they'll be arriving at PO Box 1947.
